God is good all the time…

“Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.” – Hebrews 10:23

I got a text from my 15-year-old….

It was a little after midnight….

She was in her room upstairs….

I was in my room downstairs….

We had been to church…

Hey Daddy….

I know it is kinda late….

I just wanted to share something…

Before I went to bed….

On our way home from church….

I was looking out the window….

Listening to the teaching you were playing….

We drove by a lake….

I thought how pretty it looked reflecting the moon and the sky….

Jesus put it on my heart….

That is what it looks like when we reflect Him…..

It will not be perfect….

He does not expect it to be….

There will always be ripples….

Slight imperfections….

That is just a part of being human….

When we truly grasp who He is….

We begin to truly become like Him….

If we truly reflect Him….

It is a truly beautiful sight….

Wow…

That was my 15-year-old….

She has such an amazing heart….

A heart for the Lord….

She is so sensitive….

Sensitive to the Holy Spirit….

She listens….

She hears….

She responds….

She obeys….

She has an intimacy with the Lord….

One I never had at her age….

One I may not even have now….

She is inspiring….

To say the least….

The punk is coming after her the hardest….

She is making a difference for the Lord….

The punk does not like that….

He despises the direction she is going….

The amazing plans God has for her life….

The punk hates it….

He will do all that he can to stop her….

He will fail….

She is strong….

She is faithful….

She is more than a conqueror….

She rests in Jesus….

She casts her cares on Him….

The punk throws doubt at her….

The punk throws fear….

The punk throws discomfort….

Jesus speaks….

She hears….

She listens….

She fights back with the Word of God….

She is a victor….

Going from glory to glory…..

She knows the end of the story….

She has read the back of the book….

She knows it is a spiritual battle….

She knows it is a fixed fight….

She wins….

The punk thought….

Giving her mom cancer….

Would derail her….

It has only made her stronger….

God’s faithfulness is unending….

Unending….

We were in church Wednesday night…..

Worshipping the Lord….

Praise and worship was amazing….

It was about His faithfulness….

I was surrounded with His love….

His faithfulness….

Holding hands….

One hand….

With this beautiful new relationship….

The other hand….

My fifteen-year-old daughter….

It was such a peaceful place….

Two Godly women….

Blessed by both….

Tears came to my eyes…..

Tears of joy….

This beautiful new relationship….

Another sign of God’s faithfulness….

God’s grace….

I don’t know what I did….

But I am so grateful….

She has come along beside us….

Loving the Lord…

Loving me…

Loving my children….

Loving My Healed Wife….

It is uncommon to the world….

To her….

It is all she knows how to do….

Reflect Him…

His faithfulness….

Exceedingly abundantly more than I could ask or think….

My resume….

Widowed….

Father of five young world changers….

Homeschooling….

Bankrupt….

Unemployed….

Not looking for work….

Being led by the Lord….

To serving Him in a full-time capacity….

Not knowing what that means….

But trusting in Him….

Taking one step at a time….

On paper….

I have nothing to offer someone….

On paper….

When you say it all out loud….

She should run….

She has not….

She has just drawn closer…..

Taking each step with us….

Trusting with us….

Just another sign….

Just another example….

Of His goodness….

Of His faithfulness….

I am walking in complete surrender….

I have given everything I know….

Every part of me….

Every thought….

Every room in my heart…

Every closet in my mind….

I have surrendered to Him….

I have asked Him…

Please revel anywhere I may be trying to keep…

Keep secret….

Keep to myself….

Not surrendering to Him….

He has done wonders…

Wonders with the pride that was once on me….

He continues to refine….

Renew my mind daily….

Revealing His next steps for me….

For my children….

For our future….

Still just one step at a time….

I cannot see beyond the next step….

Not for darkness….

Because of the light….

The brightness that is ahead….

It is blinding….

It is beautiful….

It is full of serving Him….

He has helped me understand….

How to tell if my dreams are His….

Or if they are mine….

Am I resisting the pride….

Has it been removed….

Are His dreams becoming my dreams….

Are His thoughts becoming my thoughts….

He put it on my heart….

Who benefits if your dreams come true….

If it is you….

Money….

Things….

Stuff….

Notoriety…..

Attention…..

They are not His dreams….

Who benefits from my dreams…

If it is others….

They might be His dreams for me…..

If my dreams glorify Him….

Not me….

They might be His dreams for me…..

Will me dreams rally people to me….

Or rally people to God….

If God….

They might be His dreams for me….

If they rally people to me….

Not His dreams….

I don’t share my testimony….

I will not do it….

I will not share my story….

It is His story….

It is a story of His faithfulness….

His faithfulness in my life….

It is not me….

It is Him….

It is all about His love….

His faithfulness….

His love….

On a broken man…..

It is His story….

All I did was receive…..

Faith….

That is all I can claim….

It is His faithfulness in my life….

His testimony….

I am just a part of it….

It is about Him….

Not me…..

……All the time God is good.

God is good all the time….

The Word of the Lord is right and true.  He is faithful in all He does. – Psalm 33:4

Last Monday was My Healed Wife’s first birthday with Jesus….

We took a trip to Orlando….

Her second favorite place….

Now surly the third….

Behind heaven….

And the beach….

She loved the parks….

Disney when the girls were small….

It was magical to them…..

Never saw a ride capture their attention like It’s a small world….

Universal as they got older….

Hagrid’s was her favorite….

Along with everyone else….

Wait time got as high as to 3 hours….

We went there to celebrate her life….

Her eternal life….

Her presence with Jesus….

I could hear her snicker….

Our futile attempt at celebration…..

I know she is amused…..

If we only knew what we had waiting…..

She had the best birthday ever….

Celebrating with Jesus….

Everyday up there…..

Better than her best day here on earth….

She is celebrating every second of every day…..

We will be with her…..

Once we have fulfilled our purpose down here….

Our time here is but a vapor…..

Feels like eternity while we are walking through it….

But it is but a vapor….

I have said it before….

I don’t comprehend eternity….

I do know it is a really really really long time….

I am ok with that….

We will have eternity together….

With Jesus….

With all our saved loved ones…..

With the children we never got to meet….

The 8 that never got to take a breath on earth….

In 100 years from now….

We will all be together….

In His presence…..

In His perfect love….

We have work to do here on earth….

A life He has lined out ahead of time for us….

We have to choose to follow….

Follow and we will complete His good and perfect will for our lives….

Let His desires and dreams…..

Become our desires and dreams….

We all have a calling on earth….

We have a specific role to play…..

In advancing His Kingdom….

In glorifying Him in all that we do….

Every thought, word, and deed…..

Glorify Him….

Letting Him guide every step….

Every breath…..

We stopped in Valdosta GA for the night on the way to Orlando….

We grabbed a quick bite to eat….

The waitress had a rough day….

She was pleasant….

Not joyful….

Not grouchy….

Just pleasant….

Her service was adequate…..

Not excellent….

Not horrible….

Adequate….

We loved on her a bit…..

She loosened up a bit….

When dinner was over….

Hannah asked if we could tip her….

I told her I always tip….

She said, “No, I mean extra”….

I said ok, how much….

She said $100…..

I asked if that was what God was telling her to do …..

She is very sensitive to the Holy Spirit moving in her….

She said yes…..

We called the waitress over…..

She was distressed….

Possibly expecting something negative….

We thanked her for taking good care of us….

We gave her a one hundred dollar bill…..

Told her Jesus loves her….

She thought it was a joke….

Are you for real….

She asked again…..

Are you for real….

Over and over with building excitement…..

Are you for real….

Are you for real….

Then she broke down….

Sobbing…..

Tears flowing…..

Tears of gratitude….

Tears of joy…..

I cried….

Hannah cried….

It is such a blessing to be a blessing….

We reminded her….

Jesus loves her…..

As we were walking out….

Hannah said…

That will be my favorite part of this vacation….

She has such an amazing heart for Jesus….

Her relationship with Him….

So intimate….

So mature….

She journals daily….

It could be a teen devotional….

It could be an adult devotional….

I am called to serve Him in a greater capacity…..

If He puts it on her heart….

She could be a part of what ever ministry we land on…..

She is blessed to be a blessing…..

She is My Healed Wife through and through….

In a quiet moment at home this week…..

I had a little Hannah and Daddy time….

I just hugged her….

Told her I was proud of her….

My Healed Wife was proud of her…..

Jesus was proud of her…..

She squeezed a little tighter…..

Tears welled up…..

That is all I ever want daddy…..

She inspirers me….

She motivates me to be a better follower….

To be a better daddy…..

To be a better example….

He has great things for our lives….

In one of her last audible words….

My Healed Wife said….

Don’t stop living….

In honor of her….

And to His glory….

We will do that….

We will shine the love of Jesus….

Brighter and brighter….

Every day…..

He has been so faithful….

He has been so good…..

He has covered us with His love….

Every step….

Every breath….

Covered with His love….

What the punk meant for evil….

Jesus turned to good…..

What was meant to be horrible….

Jesus injected His beautiful….

What the punk meant to wreck….

Jesus injected His perfect peace….

It has been a beautiful horrible experience….

I am a peaceful wreck….

The punk loses….

I used to call him the enemy….

Enemy is a title….

Like boss….

Showing a little sign of respect….

To use a title….

Titles are earned….

They indicate significance….

If someone calls me Mr. Kerry….

Or bossman…..

Or father….

I react well….

A child calls me dude…..

I react a little differently….

That is why he is just “punk”,,,,

He deserves no other but the least respectful name I can think of…..

Punk….

That is all he is…..

Just a punk in this world….

Defeated….

Rejected….

Through Jesus….

I have overcome the world….

I have overcome the punk….

He has no grip….

Only what we give him….

As for me and my family….

We will give the punk no grip….

We will serve the Lord….

We all have a calling…..

He is equipping me for this next season…..

For His calling on my life….

The calling to make a difference for Him….

Like I never have before….

To serve Him with all that I have….

He is equipping me….

I am choosing…..

To not stop living….

He is confirming His words with signs following….

His still soft voice….

Encouragement from others….

A beautiful new relationship….

One I never thought I would have again….

He is equipping me….

He is equipping my family….

He is preparing us…..

To honor My Healed Wife…..

To glorify Him…..

Like never before…..

The punk meant for 2023 to be horrible….

But God…..

My Healed Wife is with Jesus….

Healed and whole…..

In His presence…..

In His glory….

We are in His hands here on earth….

More intimate than ever….

All of us hungry for more…..

His hand is in all we do…..

His love abounding everywhere…..

Giving us exceedingly abundantly…..

Above all we could ask or think….

In everything….

In everyone He has put in our path….

Exceedingly abundantly….

All we had to do….

Was draw near to Him….

And He drew near to us….

We cast our cares on Him…..

Because He cares for us….

We love….

Because He first loved us….

….. all the time God is good

God is good all the time…..

“For to be carnally minded is death, but to be spiritually minded is life and peace” – Romans 8:6

I have been very emotional….

Not is a hormonal kinda way….

Not in an easy to offend kinda way….

Not in a quick to react kinda way….

Not in an irrational behavior kinda way ….

It a beautiful, joy filled kinda way….

I have this amazing peace about everything….

A peace that transcends all understanding….

A perfect peace….

Even though….

We are still under attack….

He is coming at me….

Through the judgement of others….

Still….

Perfect peace…..

The enemy does not like God’s plans for our life….

My children….

Under attack….

Still have an amazing peace about everything….

The Lord has such big plans for this family….

Plans to make a difference in the lives of others….

My Healed Wife has always made the claim….

The claim that she was raising world changers…..

She did…..

She still is…

I am trying to continue her legacy….

They have been raised to love the Lord….

They have been raised to love others….

They have been raised to serve….

They have been raised to not be a victim….

They have been raised as victors in Him….

They have been raised to choose joy….

To seek first His Kingdom and His Righteousness….

To be more than conquerors ….

To be able to do all things through Him….

To give….

They have learned hope….

Love….

Joy…

Peace…

Patience….

Kindness….

Goodness….

Faithfulness…

Self control….

They have learned all this from her….

From her teaching them the Word….

From walking it out in her own life…..

People are watching them….

They always have….

They have always been a light….

A light in the darkness….

They shine of the love of Jesus….

They are a reflection of their mama…..

A reflection of her and her heart for Jesus….

I am better known….

As my children’s father….

Not as Kerry….

As their dad…..

Because of the light that shines….

So many know my children…..

I am just the guy that drives them around….

And that is ok….

That is the best encouragement a father could have….

A family that shines….

Shines because of Jesus in their hearts….

They are making a difference now…..

They are just getting started….

They have so much more to do….

The enemy is attacking from every angle…..

Trying to pull them down….

Trying to slow them down….

It is a spiritual battle….

He is attacking their minds….

Trying to get access to their thoughts….

Trying to pour insecurity….

Fear….

Doubt….

Worry….

All the lies he has….

He is dumping onto them….

They have on the armor of God….

The helmet of salvation…..

The understanding of His love….

That is what protects their minds….

That is the foundation she has helped to create….

The ability to protect their minds….

Protect themselves with His love….

If their mind are full of gratitude….

Full of the understanding of His love…..

The lies of the punk will not….

And cannot….

Roost in their minds….

The Word of God will cast out lies….

A mind filled with love….

Has no room for lies….

They are learning so much in this battle…..

Learning the authority they have….

They are getting stronger and stronger….

The enemy will be sorry he messed with this family….

My youngest….

He is 8….

He lights up a room when he enters…..

He wrote in his journal yesterday…..

He got all his d’s backwards….

Wrote them as b’s….

Misspelled a few words….

But his heartfelt note was powerful….

Made me cry….

Cry because I asked him to read it to me…..

He did….

He read it not with grief and sorrow….

Not as a victim…..

He read it as a victor….

He read it with joy….

He read it with hope….

He read it with peace….

Here are his words….

It was a hard process…

But we made it….

And our mom didn’t get to spend the rest of her life with us down on earth….

But we will get to see her in heaven….

That was his journal….

Those were his thoughts….

When he read it to me….

He added a line….

And we will see her soon….

Heartbreaking to read….

But as in many writings….

When it is read by the author….

It took on a whole new meaning….

It was filled with joy….

Filled with hope….

He gets it….

He is 8….

We made it….

It was tough….

But we made it….

And his mom is in heaven….

He read it with total victory…..

Smiling as he read it…..

The enemy is picking on them….

One at a time….

He is losing….

They are choosing to walk in the spirit….

They spend time in the flesh….

But just moments….

The flesh is a dark place if they stay there….

They choose to walk in the spirit….

The flesh is death….

The spirit is life…..

They are walking it out….

In front of my eyes…..

I am so proud of them….

I believe in them…..

I trust them…..

I love them…..

Just as He loves us……

We love….

Because He first loved us….

….. all the time God is good.

God is good all the time…..

“But let him who boasts boast about this: that he understands and knows me, that I am the Lord, who exercises kindness, justice and righteousness on earth, for in these I delight.” – Jeremiah 9:24

I have spent this season….

Investing….

Investing in my children….

Investing in my relationship with the Lord….

Investing in those who have invested in me….

Giving back where I can….

Investing in new relationships….

Just trying to be the best version of me….

The version God designed for me to be….

His design….

Not my wishes for His design….

Not my hopes for my future….

His design….

His plan….

His future for me….

I give it all to him….

Some cannot understand….

Some are critical in their thoughts….

I don’t listen to the enemy….

When he uses those to discourage me….

I am following God….

God and His calling on my life….

He has put it heavy on my heart to “Reach more people”….

About His mercy….

His grace….

His goodness….

His faithfulness in my life….

Reach more people…..

I don’t know what that means….

Or how to do it….

But He is guiding me….

One step at a time….

One day at a time….

He has me working very hard in preparation….

Preparation for His calling….

His calling for my future….

My future that will glorify Him….

And honor her…..

Preparing for what He has in store….

All I know is that I am going to be serving Him in a greater capacity than ever….

Reaching more people…

I have such amazing peace….

I am not concerned with those who don’t understand…..

I am not living to please them….

I am living to serve Him….

To glorify Him…

In every thought…

In every word….

In every deed….

Every intention….

With all that I am….

To advance His Kingdom….

I am doing exactly what I am supposed to be doing….

He has called me to raise my 5 world changers….

To reach more people…

That is my calling….

Reach more people….

We were at cross country practice….

I was running with my youngest….

He is eight years old….

The others went ahead….

At their own pace….

We had taken a few months off…

It was a little harder than usual….

We came to an incline….

He slowed of a moment….

Other than the pants of heavy breathing…

It had been quiet….

It had been silent….

He slowed for a moment….

The silence was broken by his words….

“The joy of the Lord is my strength” ….

“I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me”….

Louder….

His pace picking back up a little….

“The joy of the Lord is my strength” ….

“I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me”….

We crest the hill stronger than we started….

I was right where I belong….

At that moment….

Right where I belong….

Raising world changers….

World changers that will reach more people….

That will make a difference for Him…

I gave a testimony to a room of believers on Sunday….

It was a testimony of His goodness….

A testimony of His faithfulness….

In my life….

In 2023….

The year my Healed Wife went to be with the Lord….

Yes….

A testimony of gratitude….

A testimony of love….

A testimony of joy….

A testimony of peace….

A testimony of faithfulness….

I was reaching more people….

I kept it short….

Time was limited….

The testimony is hours long….

To cover it all….

Hours….

Simply…..

My Healed Wife is with Jesus…

My children and I have grown our relationship with the Lord….

And with each other….

This family is a three braided chord….

It cannot be broken….

The children….

Me….

And the Lord….

A three braided chord….

Our relationship with Him has gone deep….

Intimate…

Something I don’t ever want to end….

I just want to be closer….

I hunger for more….

To know Him deeper….

To understand His love….

Greater than I already do….

This is what happened in 2023….

I would never change it….

What the enemy meant for evil….

The Lord used for good….

The enemy lost in 2023….

In my life….

And my children’s lives….

He lost….

We were victorious in the Lord….

I have never had such amazing expectations….

I know….

If I keep giving it to Him….

EVERY detail….

Giving it to Him….

I have a future….

I have hope….

He will prosper me….

In His Kingdom….

He will redefine prosperity….

To a definition I could have never comprehended….

Until I began to understand….

Understand His love for me….

His love for my children….

His love for you…..

His perfect love….

That is for anyone….

Anyone who will receive it….

Freely….

Freely He gives….

We did nothing to earn it….

We do not deserve it….

He died so we can have it….

All we have to do is receive….

In faith….

It is by His grace….

By His grace we are saved….

By his grace we are forgiven….

What is grace….

Not getting what we deserve….

Grace is Him taking on our sins…

So that we may be forgiven….

Grace is being washed clean….

By the blood of Jesus….

Grace is Him remembering our sins no more….

Grace is not getting what we deserve for our sins….

Grace is freely given….

We just have to receive by faith….

He did all the work….

We just have to accept it….

We all have eternal life….

The decision is where do we want to spend it…..

There is not a big checklist….

We don’t have to be perfect….

We cannot be perfect….

He is giving freely….

All we have to do is receive the gift….

The gift of love….

To walk in eternal love forever….

The gift of grace….

This has been a beautiful horrible experience….

I have been a peaceful wreck….

The beautiful and the peaceful….

Supplied by the love of Jesus….

It was a horrible year and I am a wreck without Jesus….

He has been so faithful….

I have embraced His love….

I seek to understand Him more every day….

…. All the time God is good

January 9^th, 2023

God is good all the time….

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart.” – Proverbs 3:5

2024 is here…

That is good….

For so many reasons….

Not why you would expect….

As I reflect on 2023….

I could say it was a horrible year….

For the obvious….

In the flesh….

It was horrible….

My best friend….

I now have a different relationship with her….

Not one I was expecting….

I thought I had much longer….

I thought I would be the first to go….

I miss her laugh….

I miss her smile….

I miss holding her hand….

I miss the open conversations….

I miss being kept in line….

I miss all that….

After 18 plus years….

To have her physical presence gone….

It absolutely stinks in the flesh….

It comes upon me….

The sorrow….

It comes upon me sometimes….

Without warning….

I embrace it for a moment….

Shed a tear….

But I have to press on….

I have to press back to walking in the spirit….

Rejoicing with her…..

I cannot stay in that place of pain….

She would not want me in that place of pain….

He does not want me in that place of pain….

He took it all from me….

The pain….

The sorrow….

My cares….

He took them all from me….

When He died on the cross…..

Why would I want to take them back from Him….

It would almost be like telling Him….

You did all that for nothing….

I want to carry it all myself….

Thanks but no thanks God …..

Ignorance….

Or pride….

Or both…..

He died so we could live…..

He died so we could have the hope….

The hope that is in Jesus….

Knowing she is healed…..

Knowing she is at His right hand….

Knowing she is whole….

Knowing she is in His presence….

For eternity….

I know I don’t grasp eternity….

But I do know….

It is a really really really long time….

And that is good enough for me….

When I think about 2023….

It is a celebration in the spirit….

My Healed Wife….

Is in His presence….

How could I wish anything different for her….

How could I do anything but celebrate….

My relationship with Him….

Deeper and more intimate than ever….

By a lot….

Like infiniti a lot….

Back to that concept I struggle with comprehending….

The growth in my relationship….

I don’t know how to measure….

It has come through trust….

It has come through faith….

I thought I had trust….

I thought I had belief….

I thought I had faith….

He has revealed to me….

I did not….

Not to the full….

I had limitations….

Myself….

Pride….

Thinking I could do things on my own….

He pointed out my biggest sin to me this year….

From Hebrews 12…..

The sin that so easily ensnares us….

It is different for each one of us….

He revealed to me….

The sin that easily ensnares me…..

Pride….

In my career….

In my life….

As a man….

I am a fixer….

As a man….

The leader of the house….

I am the fixer….

Pride….

Says I am the source of the solution…..

I am the source of the fix…

Humility…..

Trust….

Says I look to Him as the source of the solution….

He is the only source of the fix….

I am still a fixer….

I am just no longer the source of the fix….

I would let His word influence me….

I would use it for a suggested route…

A map I would peek at….

And then tuck away….

Just looking at the first road….

And the destination….

Trusting in myself….

To find the rest of the route….

Pride would step in…..

I would take control of the wheel….

He has had to recalibrate….

So many times….

Constant recalibrating….

I start on His route….

Letting Him guide me…..

Then pride sets in….

I would take the wheel….

I stop letting His thoughts be my thoughts….

I start letting my thoughts be my thoughts….

I stop following his will for my life….

I start praying for my will for my life….

His will is so much better…..

What was I thinking….

There is no need to recalibrate…..

No wrong turns….

When He has the wheel….

Constant recalibrating….

When I take the wheel….

I start in His direction….

I put my head down and charge forward….

On my own….

I look up….

I am 50 miles from anywhere He intended me to be…..

What did He reveal to me in 2023…..

He revealed to me that I was not trusting in Him….

He was a resource….

He was a guide….

But I was in control….

I had the wheel….

I was trusting in myself….

Significantly in my career….

A little less in other areas….

But trusting in myself….

He has taught me….

How to trust….

How to let His word….

Be final authority in my life….

My will….

My wish….

Is to serve Him….

Full time…..

Whatever that looks like…..

If He points me in a direction…..

Yes sir….

On my way….

But then….

Keep my head up….

Looking to Him….

For direction….

In every step….

Along the way….

Trusting in Him….

Trusting in His word….

Trusting in His promises….

I want nothing more…..

Than to live a life worthy of His calling….

We have art on our wall…

“As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord”….

It was an intention before 2023…..

It is a philosophy…..

A new way of thinking….

It is now our way of life….

No longer an intention….

But a way of life….

That is what 2023 brought….

To me and my children….

We are trusting without boarders….

We felt His presence….

Like never before….

In 2023…..

We heard His voice….

Like never before….

In 2023…..

We got a better understanding….

Of the depth…

Of the magnitude….

Of His love for us….

In 2023….

He showed us the value of good friends….

So many people walking along with us…..

In 2023….

He showed us new relationships….

He brought people to light….

People who have been there for over 14 years….

He brought them into a new light….

Into new and beautiful relationships….

In 2023….

We chose to live a new life….

We began to feel what it is like….

To make His word….

Final authority in our life….

We fully expect….

2024….

To be so much more…..

This has been a beautiful horrible experience….

I am a peaceful wreck…..

I thank God for the beautiful and the peaceful….

I would be a horrible wreck without Him….

….. all the time God is good